EvolutionHealth.care

Home
Main Forum
Anxiety
Health Educator´s Corner
Why me?

Advanced Search Form

Why me?

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 517

That's true. I feel it isn't important... sometimes I think that about the past as well. I'd rather focus on "ok what now" instead of "why" but it is good for reference and how to approach the what now. I was very bad at depending on people first when my anxiety first started. I didn't want to let anyone in... but that has pretty much changed now and I feel like, if they're offering just take it with appreciation. I don't really understand my pattern.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

It is not important to getting better, all it does is explain why you are the way you are. You have to know how you were treated in the first 11 months of your life to know which category you fit in. It is not important because even if you are in the wrong one you can change to fit the right one. I spent the first six weeks of my life in an incubator. Only the nurses picked me up. After I was cared for almost exclusively by my grand mother. I did not form an attachment to any one person. Therefore I am not in the first, preferred category. I am not a team player. I am very independent. Not good for some one who now has to depend on others, but I am changing. This is probably why I have suicidal thoughts. I do not want to depend on anyone. The price seems too high. But I have no choice. It really contributes to the anxiety. I have been let down so many times that I find it hard to let go. Even when I try to share I find myself wandering off and doing things by myself. All my jobs have had minimum supervision. I work very well by myself. Yet my therapist says inside I am a social person, just not outside. I am misunderstood a lot. It matters not, I like me even though I fight a constant battle with my core beliefs. I can not see anything wrong with me yet I have a limited number of friends and I feel they may be the same way. I must look at this more.

Davit.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 517

I looked up some information about attachment theory but don't really understand it. My ex was very spoiled by his mother but he seemed to have Oppositional Defiant Disorder. I know my parents always said not to cry as children but I think they were there when I wanted some affection but I am still insecure about myself.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 373

I suffered a bit of a traumatic experience at the beginning of the summer that resulted in an emergency room visit (I was dehydrated, following an illness). My life was also out-of-balance at the time as our 11-year-old daughter had bravely embarked on a 7-week summer camp adventure. This was when I began having panic attacks for the first time. They went away without treatment after a month but they returned about a month ago. I saw a therapist and together we determined that I was afraid of becoming dehydrated again. This is what I am currently working to resolve.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 356

Anxiety for me is something I have had since late childhood and possibly before.

I was a poor fit with my environment growing up. I was a sensitive child and would be a different person had I been raised in a sensitized environment. This i know.

I have struggled to heal. I have been retraumatized a lot though as an adult (by being in uncaring spaces) and that has recently stopped and I have read that healing is pretty hard to do when one is being re-wounded all the time. I know what kind of environment I have always needed, and have been very frustrated that I cannot create that environment for myself. None of us can, even if we try, the world around us is the world around us, not something we can completely shape and control. If there are a lot of kind, sensitive people around you, it can make a big difference compared to if you just have a lot of crummy people around you. People who don't have a problem taking advantage of others. I know some people now who would never be ok taking advantage of other people and it is a relief to be around them. I don't know how to act when I am around that but that will come with time if they give me a chance to learn. I have to re-socialize myself as I grew up anxious and it changed my personality in ways i don't like .

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Anerol

In attachment theory there are four personality types depending on how a child is treated in their first eleven months. The next major personality conditioner is from eleven months to the end of the seventh year. The good news is that a person can move from one personality type to another. I was a shy child outside of my family as a child and periodically through my early adult life. I certainly am not shy anymore. This I attribute to CBT and a knowledge of core beliefs and how wrong they can be.

There is another theory that says we still have some instinct in our makeup. An inherited tendency in our DNA that dictates personality much like DNA dictates everything else about us. Ever feel like you have been here before or you know something you were not taught?

Some times adopted children turn out to be like their real parents despite an education contrary. Where does this come from?

Davit.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 517

I was always a shy kid. I guess that makes me as having social anxiety disorder as a child... although I always thought shyness was just a trait. My anxiety attacks and disorder started after I got married and I still have it after my divorce.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Anxiety disorders affect approximately 25% of all North Americans! That’s one out of every four people that experiences and anxiety or panic disorder at some point in their life. Anxiety and panic are the result of both genetic and environment factors. If a family member has an anxiety disorder, you have a higher risk of developing an anxiety disorder. You may have also had a unique experience in your life that has contributed to your anxiety as well. This may have been an embarrassing or traumatic experience or may be due to accumulated stress over an extended period of time.

About 1 in 10 people will have an elevated sensitivity to anxiety throughout the duration of their lives. For other, they may have a brief bout with heightened anxiety that will pass.

Members, is there an event in your life that you believed contributed to your anxiety? Has it been a life long struggle or something that was triggered later in life?

Samantha, Health Educator

Reading this thread:

today's top discussions:

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Active

Most Loved

Why me?