My goal is to add some new skills to my resume by volunteering. I struggle with work issues so I feel good knowing I can back out, that I am just volunteering and not committing myself too much.
I am very passionate about making this world a better place and I need somewhere to direct my passions! I want to eventually work for a nonprofit doing some kind of volunteer management, admin or something like that. And so, I am looking to see what kind of volunteer opportunities there are here in my city.
I am also hoping to gain some new skills as I don't know how much longer I can physically and emotionally work in the field I am employed in. I am an Early Childhood Educator.
Anyways, this is my new goal. I am scared but I know I need to do this.
I do have some performance anxiety. I tend to assume the worst as well. I have been at my current position since January and come Monday mornings I am still feeling worried etc. I do not have much confidence either.
In my job I have to be able to diffuse situations very quickly and I worry about that. It is very on the spot. I am a bit of a control freak so I don't like it when the room I work in (daycare) erupts into chaos.
I am a little on the stressed side. My husband's family has always made little comments about my intelligence and today I awoke to find another of these comments posted in a round about way on my Facebook page where I had planned an event for my daughter's 10th birthday.
I do not know how to cope with rude comments. My husband's family tend to be "know-it-alls" and I get that, but boy do I get mad when they correct grammar and speak as if they are members of the royal family. They even say things like "one does try ones best". Who says "one" like that all the time? None of them are very wealthy, they are not well educated other than watching Masterpiece Theatre all the time.
Grrrrr. Anyways. I can't stand it when people put others down. I hate it. I know I should ignore it but I am tired of being stepped on. More often than not I take those stupid comments to heart. It effects my confidence. I don't know how to ignore them. How do I tell my brain to stop thinking about it and move on? I was always told to ignore these issues but I feel like I am ready to blow!
I do agree. My way of dealing with my in-laws is usually to make a joke or re-direct the conversation. My family, my husband's relatives and even my daughter has complained about the know it all attitude so I at least can find solace in the fact that it isn't just me! I do find it draining and I have stood up for myself lately but I don't like doing it. Who likes confrontation? I suppose I do have to learn to ignore them in a way though. They aren't the types to take advice if you understand. They are very stubborn and they tend to learn things the hard way.
For now I will breathe deeply and re-read my interpersonal communication skills book. I have to re-learn all those techniques. :D
I will also take to the canvas today and get out some of my anger and turn it into something nice. I always paint for myself and don't care what others think of my paintings so it will always be enjoyable. Maybe I will paint a sunflower ;)
I really like the idea of "on my own terms". I really like that. I suppose I never thought I was "allowed" to have it that way. My mother always raised us to be doormats in a way. Always care more about what other think of you and all that.
Being a constant people pleaser is too hard for me.
Thank you everyone for all the responses. It helps put things into perspective.
I forgot to mention that I have spoken to my husband but he usually approaches it all in a "pick your own battles" method. He doesn't bother to fight them anymore since they never learn and it just makes him mad. But he does support me and we can rant together :)
First off, I love the flower on your profile. Very beautiful.
I have a huge fear of dentists too. My mother takes atavan every time she has to go! I learned the fear through her.
My niece though, takes the cake. She really has her own way of dealing with it and I love it. This is her method: no talking, not even the dentist or hygienists, she must wear those bed time eye masks and she has her iPod on the whole time, loud. And the dentist goes along with it. I love it. I love that she was strong enough to demand that all. She suffers from stress induced seizures so she has to remain calm or end up in an ambulance. She seizes when blood is drawn etc.
I will also have to go to the dentist soon too. I have chipped my back molar as well since I clench my teeth all night. So I am with you.
I kind of wish I could just do a walk in when I get the courage. I will end up making a family appointment I think.
I hope it all works out for you. I am with you in spirit.
My daughter is filled with anxiety and stress right now. She is starting Grade 5 on Wednesday. I understand her stress and worry. I hated school so much. I used to dread it all. I didn't have good friends so even that angle didn't work for me. I actually still feel stress whenever September rolls around. Back to school jitters and I am not even going to school anymore!
My heart goes out to all the other "fall" worriers.
I am going to try meditating every night with my daughter. I read that meditation reduces stress etc. I will try just about anything to help alleviate these feelings.
I read Jill Bolte Taylor's book recently about when she had a stroke and for the first time she didn't hear that little voice obsessing and nattering anymore. I actually wished for a stroke just to get rid of my excess thoughts!
A little trick I do is to focus only on what I am doing. For example: I am washing my hair. I am washing my hair. Rather than washing my hair and thinking too much. Another example: I am looking at the light, looking in my mirror, now the light is changing....etc. I am not sure if it will work with you but you never know.
My thoughts are with all of us on here trying to get through this.
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