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drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Hi, ive been agoraphobic for 2 years and had IBS about that long and more recently (about 3 months ago) i started being constantly pannicky, all day every day im on edge, shakey, heart palps, nausea, dizziness. I have the feelings alot of losing control and going crazy and feel detached from my body, my dr has prescribed me buspirone but so far hasnt helped much, only been taking it 3 days though  so far. I have lost a 1st 7lbs in the space of the 3 months so am now only 8 st, find it difficult to eat anything and am currently thinking food intolerances are the cause of some of my anxiety and feeling sick.
My negative thoughts are mostly "what if i never get better" "what if i lose control and hurt myself or someone else" what if i have an accident" times going so slow, how am i going to make it through the day" "what if i have a panic attack" If im alone i know ill panic" "what if everyone leaves me" "what if CBT doesnt work"...and i dont know where to start challenging these thoughts. Everyday just seems to go so slowly, ill look at the clock and 10 mins has gone by and it feels like hours. Any advice on how to challenge these thoughts would be much appreciated
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Thanks for the words of reassurance, just everything seems so bleak at the moment. The constant mental chatter is truly awful and i have no idea how to shut it off. Starting CBT next week through the NHS aswell so hopefully if i do this and that ill take a 2 pronged approach and beat this anxiety. Trying to eat little and often to try and put the weight back on and give me energy, keep going with my yoga and exercise more, hopefully that will help with my insomnia too.
 
Everyone on these forums seem so lovely
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Hey yeah your right most my negative thoughts are what ifs. I am trying to challenge them it seems to be slow going though as i have to challenge them every waking minute, they dont let up. And no im not in a band anymore, nothing seems to take my mind off stuff, ive tried many things, doing my open uni work, playing drums, playing games, cooking, painting model cars, redecorating the living room and kitchen but im still constantly in the mind chatter what if's constantly. I dunno what i can do to successfully divert my mind, everything seems so hard, like ive lost interest in everything and cant get into doing anything. i need to get out of this negative cycle though and stop this mind chatter.
 
Thanks for the support
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Its the anxiety causing the depression i think, but its constant all day everyday panic, even not in full blown panic attack all day im constantly dizzy and feel sick, and a bit unreal, i cant stop my thoughts at all, no matter what i try i still feel anxious all the time and its so hard and then i have a few full blown attacks every day, i dunno if this is panic disorder or GAD but its horrible. Is it normal to feel this way constantly or just the odd time?
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Ive just started a new med, buspirone about 4 days ago, i tried escitalopram, pregabalin and another ssri i cnt remember what but they just made me suicidal, i know it can make you worse before it makes you better though, im just finding it so difficult atm i cant sleep i cant eat its constant panick...i have been reffered to CBT through the national health service and start next week, im just so scared im going to be like this forever. I dont even know where to start with CBT, im trying to think positively and challenge my thoughts with the 10 questions but dont seem 2 be working, but then again its only been 2 days of trying it.
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

well my current doctor says that he wont prescribe me anything else after the buspirone if it doesnt work but i might mention  Tricyclic anti depressants to him see what he thinks, he did offer me more valium but im scared to take them, i have taken a few in the past few months when ive been really bad but i actually panic when i think i might have to take sedatives and get addicted and be worse off in the end. i feel like im dying.

Currently im lying in bed with a burning face, dry mouth, massive headache, got no energy whatsoever and spacey. i just want to be the way i was, a happy bouncy fun guy that did loads of stuff, i mean before i got so bad i was agoraphobic but i could always find stuff to do in the house, now i cant seem to do anything
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
i am new any thought

Hey, so sorry to hear what your going through...my agoraphobia started with my IBS,  i didnt like going out incase i had a bout of IBS and had an "accident" and then the panic from that made me slightly anxious so then i needed to urinate more so then i panicked when i wwas out if i wasnt near a toilet...so embarrasing. But i know alot of people with anxiety have the same problem. Stick in there, we'll get better together. I dont quite beleive my thoughts either that i put in place of my negative ones...i want to beleive them, god i do but its like my minds against me and i still dont beleive my positive thoughts...i know ive never came to any harm, i know ive never gone crazy or lost control, ive never really had anything major wrong with me that i havnt been able to cope with before and yet my mind doesnt beleive the positives, stupid isnt it.
 
Wish you well,
Drew
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Thankyou so much for the support.
Yes the horror stories are bad, i first got really bad with my anxiety when i took escitalopram...that was the trigger for the really bad anxiety i have now, and taking more meds to counteract the anxiety is scary, im kind of hopeful that CBT will work im just so scared that it wont, everything just seems so bleak at the moment and im terrified. ive lost more weight again, i weighed myself today, so now the total ive lost since bad anxiety started 3 months ago is...1st 9lbs. im scared of that too, i feel like im wasting away i look like a twig. the depersonalisation i get all day everyday is terrifying too, i feel like im losing control...even tho i have never lost control, i have never come to any harm its just horrible i cnt seem to stop my anxiety. I feel so stupid because i havnt come to any harm and dont know why i feel this way...one thing i'd like to know is with CBT if you put the work in how long does it take to take effect? or is everyone different. I just want this to be over with so much so i can be me again. Also do meds stop your mind chatter, bcoz i cant think of anything else but my anxiety atm, trying different things, wondering if ill get better just the same thoughts all day going over and over.
 
Thanks
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Thanks so much will_e, i would love to chat over email or skype, i dont even know how to use the buddy messenger on this site. I know your right, its my mind thats causing all these horrible sensations and hopefully i will get my mind under control.
 
Drew
drewwypoo
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9 years ago 0 drewwypoo 13 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Newbie, any advice appreciated!

Hey i find now that even though my general anxiety is sky high my stomach troubles arent too bad, but i have cut out everything i may be intolerant too, i had a food intolerance test done last year (dunno how accurate it is) and i stuck with it a while and my IBS was alot better, but then i went on an all out binge on anything session. But i have recently started it again, not eating anything that i have a intolerance too...i deffo know i am lactose intolerant because (excuse the french) i fart like a donkey afterwards. Plus atm im not eating much anyway so my IBS isnt playing up so its hard to judge, but my stomach deffo feels better cutting out wheat and milk, gluten, rice etc so im just gonna try eating little and often of the things i know im allowed and keeping a food diary i started a few days ago.
 
I think i definatly need to get my general anxiety levels/constant depersonalisation down to an acceptable level before i even try to get out more though, i just dont know where to begin lol, today i do seem a bit more happy than usual although my depersonalisation is still strong, i just got new glasses aswell after i had an eyetest and realised my eyesight was really bad and not knowing because i had nothing to compare it to, so the new glasses are making things slightly clearer and more colourful...less blurry, but their making me rather dizzy lol.
 
I am trying to tackle my negative thought patterns though and trying to relax more and not let my anxiety make me depressed.
 
Drew