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karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Lousy Day

hi

feel like a big old rant so hear i go, PAS have got worse over the past week and so has depression (still on the waiting list to see a councillor), everthing seems to be going wrong. hardly getting any work at the moment because of  the credit crunch which obviously means a strain on the finances which is very stressful in its self. i found myself constantly worrying over ths and crying because i just dont no what to do?! i feel physically i cannot cope anymore and feel very alone, noone to turn to because i bug them with my problems all the time. i feel im trapped in a room and cant get out because there is no way out. its like what is the point of living?im going to die when i havent accomplished anything, and feel bad for my daughter for this leaving her in the lurch with no future and nothing to leave her.

i also have had a biopsy recently which showed abnormal cells on my cervix and have to have treatment to treat the pre-cancerous cells which scares the hell out of me and really not good at taking pain at the moment dont no why never used to affect me even when i gave birth with no pain relief.

any help??

xx

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
cant get on to my session diary

have now registered for 3.0
karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Food fear...

i am now able to drink coke and eating curry, after about a year. still not touched alcohol but im not really bothered that havent been able to as in not affecting my day to day life

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
New to the forum and anxiety, looking for support!

hi jamie,

im karla and have had paniic attacks and anxiety for about a year, i agree days definately vary dramatically, some days i am fine other days i feel the whole world is against me and i feel panicky all day and very depressed and btw im only 23. 

i dont think anyone will be able 2 answer how long you will have these for, it varies differently for each person and situation. i understand where you are coming from about wanting to be that person you used to be, i think i have never been grateful for my life before these, i was so care free and only had little problems to worry about but you take this for granted till you get somthing like this, and your whole life changes, im a totally different person now, some aspects are good where as some are bad, im not up for a laugh anymore, im moody alot, very worried and scared about things. never used to be like this.

have you heard about rewind therapy? i have to say tho this place is good to help you get over things, hearing different stories, people not judging you. they help you and everyone listens to what you have to say. 

have you started the sessions or read any threads?

hope you get better soon. ps sorry 2 hear bout your grandad.

xx

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
stressful days :(

hey

ok this is my post to vent out all my stress and frustration, i am trying relaxation techniques and also more exercise, and hot stone therapy as it is meant to be good for anxiety and depression along with acheing muscles etc.

i am struggling at the moment and i doont think it helps that it is winter and the credit crunch. i thought i was getting better as now i can drink fizzy drinks but my mental state has got worse. i think i need things to keep myself occupied, but nothing seems to interest me anymore, it all seems a waste of time,hopeless. i feel down alot and sick with a lump in my throat and crying.its my birthday sat and people want to celebrate it but i just want to ignore that it is my birthday but people cant understand that?am i weird to feel this way?

any suggestions?anyone got over this?

xx

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
stressful days :(

also i would just like to leave my daughter a few things like have a stable up bringing and not have to struggle like me but that seems hopless.

i do write things down now and yes it does help because when it is written down it you dont worry about it so much whether it is frustrating thoughts or bills, i would suggest it to anyone who has alot on there mind. thanku for all your suggestions by the way. its horrible when you feel so alone. also CM no offence taken, i think its good to all have our own posts for a rant.haha. i just didnt think at the time when i was so down and depressed and upset.but hey its ok now.

xx

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
stressful days :(

ok right, yestersay i found out im pregnant!! (quite a shock to say the least). i am on the pill, also need hospital treatment well coal cogulation for pre cancerous cells, i feel very scared and alone my partner was not very helpful!!

i dont no what to do but 1 thing im surprised about i didnt have a PA!!!

xx

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
Mood Boosters

i find reading, chatting to friends and reflexology. very theraputic.

exercise is good to get the blood pumping and the endorphins going.

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
stressful days :(

hey everyone,

thankyou so much for all the advice and making me feel less alone. jhori we dont get programs like that in england-people are very unsupportive around here even medical staff!!

i do need to make some goals and need something to get me out of depression but that is definately easier said than done.i have spoken to many freinds about things and they have given me some good advice- i am finding it extremly difficult at the moment with my hormones up and down, sickness etc!!!but maybe this is something to keep my mind pre-occupied and get me over these panic attacks?? today hasnt been to bad but i have been out which i am finding easier. 

can anyone make suggestions of any goals i can make??

i think i am just going to go for a meal for my birthday something quite. thanks for all listening and being so supportive it means so much

xx

karla
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10 years ago 0 karla 52 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo
stressful days :(

im so sorry im in such and emotional reck at the minute i prob shuldnt be on here. ok it 25 mins till my lonely birthday and by that i mean i am pregnant and alone alone because the father decided tonight he dont want me or the babe even tho were engaged and live together etc... im in such a mess i dont no what to do. i feel like ending it all to be perfectly honest. im scared, i no i cant bring a baby up on my own with this depression and panic attacks it wouldnt be fare. i feel there nowhere to go, i just cant describe my feelings. i wana curl up in a little ball so everything goes away, it always happens to me its not fair. what have i done so wrong??