Hello again , I used to write here often back in the day when i was in the bar scene and a heavy partyer . I had gone 3 years no drinking and somehow thought all was good. this summer i drank lots at my fams house. its normal for them and was for me. but i fell into old habits to drink t get drunk. the hangovers, guilt , anxiety ( the usual suspects ) were now back in my life . I saw howit changed my attitude wheni drank and also others around me and do not want it in my life. i am ok when i go back home i wont drink but when i come here i cave, feel so weak. so here i sit and think no, i am going to do this , i can as i did for three years ( it was hard but it was done) . so here I am again under a new name as i cannot log into my old account. Hello again .
Hi Hors Controle and Foxman . I dont have drinking buddies anymore I cute them out but its the family that is hard . every function there is alcohol and everyone saying cmon just have one . when I was sober for the 3 years it was hard and I avoided functions but its hard in my family they get offended easily and a respect factor is high . but I also wasnt open about how the fuctions made me feel maybe they would understand more im not sure . and yes foxman its very true doesn't matter how long same vibes kick in
Thank you everyone. sooo i came up here again and well guess what , i drank and drank too much again. nowim sitting here ffeeling shame and all that comes with that . it has just proved that i am right i cannot drink . only bad things have happened when i drank because of my decisiions . i dont like who i become. and a whole bunch of other stuff im sure maybe some can understand . so now its my really day one. day one . no alcohol today .
Hello and welcome, I have recently just came back here to the community. I also am here to abstain as i go that very same cycle. i havent drank for three years as i realized when i drink i drink alot . and i started back up have a glass or two . and i wont drink at home but when i come to my families they drink alot and i spent the summer here and drank alot . even just last night . and i am feeling that guilt and shame now also . i wish you good luck on your journey and you are not alone .
Thanks Lynn , im still here at my familys house but will be leaving tomorrow . jsut working on some stuff may paint. painting helps with my anxiety . still feeling really crappy but i did get my answer but i think deep down i already knew that i cant drink
so setting my goal . my Goal is no alcohol at all. its fine when im at home I'm don't drink . but at gatherings and at my family's seems impossible, they are all drinkers and think everything is ok . and i dont know why its so hard for me to not drink with them , i do know that i drank in the past as i have anxiety and it always made it got away ...until the next morning of course which it was worse . i remember i had high anxiety as a child when my family got drunk , I hated it . funny I turned out to be a huge partier , I have that same feeling around people who drink I get anxiety . I don't know how I will get through but I will have to find away because nothing feels worse then waking up, and having a huge hang over, shame , guilt, all of that . so i will take it day by day . any tips for staying strong in those situations (staying strong around family)
yes and I have before and they look at me like ...ahhhh your fine , one drink is fine , you dont have a prob . and I also struggle with my own self convincing .
I totally agree ! and that is a great way of phrasing it thank you! my mind convinces myself that I am ok so maybe its not even them maybe its me and I use them as an excuse to drink. who knows, all I know its that my body does actually need a break and I cannot drink. I really like how you put that because it helped me see it differently ! I have always put my issues on others . oh they drink so I drink. I need to also take responsibility . they dont force it down my throat .
as I have posted in my other posts I had stopped drinking for 3 years and when I come home I dont drink but that is because I replace it with eating. I am trying to figure out what this means....when I drink I drink to drink, when I eat I eat until I am so full , . its like all or nothing....how can I heal if I have no idea what is wrong...any ideas? see if it were just alcohol I focus on that but its more so im not sure where to focus on. I mean right now I am trying not to drink at all cause I hate the cycle I go through. but I notice its the eating as well. |Any insight would be great. Hope your having great morning so far.
Thanks for replying everyone . I did eat when i was drinking but on the days i didnt . and it sounds like a plan to find a way to sooth or maybe cope . I have high anxiety already spoke to doctor and awaiting therapy but i think that i have used the drinking to not feel the constant anxiety and the eating . i think i need to learn coping skills for the anxiety? not sure . and i was doing well with my plan not to drink but came up to see my family and drank....again and now not only do i feel bad physically i feel bad mentally . ashamed , anxiety all that stuff .
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