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Can?t seem to get on track


11 years ago 0 1562 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I'm hoping you didn't take offense to it, I apologize if you did, that wasn't my intention

Please, no need to apologize. Hope you were helped by members and made you comfortable and also handed you a copy of the Big book. If not next time you go there ask for one. In the meantime, you may read it online:

http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_tableofcnt.cfm

11 years ago 0 557 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks you all for sharing.
 
Camiol, I have develop also a physical addiction to alcohol. My mom keeps on telling me to go seek for some kind of help, but I did it and the only answer  I found was that I felt that extreme loneliness even when I was surrounded by people., even when my husband was still with me. Maybe it is a feeling of emptiness, my life has got boring, working all the time and taking care of the children because my husband was never home. I am not reproaching this to him but it is like I got on a boat with no keel and it was just easier to let myself drift away until one day I hit the shore. Don't put too much guilt on yourself... it will probably not help you. Mind you, I am still alone after 9 years because I can become a nasty person when I drink. lol.
 
Enjoy the holidays season and try to remind yourself why and when you are going to commit, get the support from your family. I know my kids are helping me a lot now, calling me more often, etc,
 
I am also planning to stop completely January 8th. Too many occasions happening before it so I will do my best to control myself until then. Let"s do it together" WE CAN DO IT!!
 
 
 
 
11 years ago 0 616 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Mizzy your mom is a very wise lady.  I agree...if drinking makes me feel bad, then what is the point?  I wish it was just that easy to say "I'm not doing this anymore" and never have another drink.  I would love to be able to drop this addiction like it was an insignificant part of my life.  Unfortunately it's become a huge part of my life and I need to find the strength within me to overcome the addiction.  If only it was an easy thing to do.  A few years ago I seriously did not believe that a person could become physically dependent on alcohol.  I thought that by calling yourself an alcoholic, it gave you the excuse to drink and people would say its a disease, it's not your fault.  Well I know differently now.  I do know that it's a physical addiction and it's a very bad monkey on our backs.  Up til three years ago, I was not a problem drinker.  I don't know what happened, the addiction snuck up on me without my awareness.  It angers me that I let this happen.  I swore I would NEVER be an alcoholic like my mom.....and here I am, an alcoholic. 

I think for the dinner party this weekend I will stick to Caesars since they are very filling and I don't drink near as much when I drink Caesars.  Wine is my problem, I drink it until I'm oblivious and end up passing out and having several black outs.  I hate that and I feel like I let everyone down when that happens.  

I would give anything to be a "normal" drinker again, but once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.  I will moderate the best way I know how until the holidays are over.  Hopefully in the new year I will start my sobriety.  Thank you for sharing your mom's words Mizzysoleil.....I appreciate it.  
11 years ago 0 1853 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Camiol, 

I'm sorry to hear you are really struggling with drinking in moderation.  You mention that you "just can't bring myself to join AA or get counseling".  What is keeping you from going to a meeting?  What concerns do you have about seeking help in that way?  
 
MizzySoleil, thank you for sharing what your mom said.  It is a simple yet very powerful statement that will help people consider how drinking affects them..
 

Vincenza, Health Educator
11 years ago 0 112 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Foxman,
I hope you realize I was joking... I mean I didn't know what to expect with my first meeting, and I was just tying to make light of what is definitely a terrible media stereotype, I'm hoping you didn't take offense to it, I appologize if you did, that wasn't my intention.
 
MizzySoleil
 
11 years ago 0 1562 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
As a student, I thought it would just be a bunch of old grumpy guys reading quotes from a book (haha, no offense fellow AA members, especially the guys here)

Cool. Yes thats what the media projects AA members as using some of the exceptions. I am not saying everybody in AA is Joyous, Happy and Free but those who take the program of AA seriously (Namely the 12 steps) do find serenity. Hope you find that too.
11 years ago 0 112 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey Camiol,
My mom said something very wise to me the other day...she said "alcohol is supposed to relax you/enhance certain social moments of your life. If it is causing you grief or making you feel bad in ANY way, and especially if the bad is outweighing the good, then what's the point?" And I thought about it, and it makes sense...to someone without an alcoholic mind of course;) But, the simplicity of the statement is amazing to me. If thinking about drinking at a party is causing us grief, making us nervous, we need to realize that this is NOT something other people without a drink problem necessarily go through, they take the amount of alcohol they want, and then they stop, they don't worry about "overdoing it". Wouldn't it be lovely to NEVER have to worry about the negative effects of alcohol again if we could only feel the positive effects like everybody else?
 
I certainly can't answer your question because I have come to realize that moderation is not possible for me. In fact, I went to my first AA meeting today, and it wasn't that bad:) As a student, I thought it would just be a bunch of old grumpy guys reading quotes from a book (haha, no offense fellow AA members, especially the guys here), so I really didn't think it would work for me. So anyways, I guess I'm just saying it's worth a sit-in on a meeting to see if anything hits home with you.
 
So I have given you absolutely no moderation advice, I hope other people can help you in that domain:) Good luck! Happy Holidays:)
 
11 years ago 0 616 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I am having a hard time lately with my drinking.  I know that I should probably seek professional help to assist me with overcoming this addiction, but I just can't seem to bring myself to join AA or get counseling.  I so desperately want to be normal again.  I drank Friday, Saturday and last night.  I didn't overdo it on Friday or Saturday, but last night I drank too much.  I am starting to hate myself again when I drink too much.  I really want to stop and I am aiming for abstinence in the new year.  It's actually something I look forward to, but while I am preparing myself to stop this addiction from ruling my life, I am desperate to find a way to be more controlled when I have drinks.  This coming weekend concerns me because I'm hosting a dinner party on Saturday and I truly do not want to get loaded and pass out.  I wish I could just stop now but the holiday season is a very difficult time to try to abstain.  I am going to try with all the strength I have to stop drinking after the Christmas season is done.  If anyone has any helpful tips to get me through Christmas dinners without getting loaded, please help me out.  I have tried the water between drinks thing, it doesnt work for me, I just stop drinking the water.  I do know that if I drink Caesars they are very filling and I tend to drink them very slowly and I stop when I feel full.  Maybe that's my answer.  

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