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Holidays again?


13 years ago 0 199 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Tiana,
 
Thank you for you respond.  You are right Christmas is in the past now.  I even said the same thing myself in my post.  So I have taken your advice and set some new goals for myself.  I have also been engaging in some pleasant activities the last day or two..I am focusing on my quilting now which I really enjoy and am looking forward to signing up for a class at my local community collage this coming semester.  They have a ongoing quilting class.  I am looking forward to seeing some of my classmates and taking my quilts to the show and tell that they have.  I have also indulged myself and bought myself a fabric cutting machine and many dies to go with it.  I thought I was going to have to stop quilting because of my back but not now that I have given myself a big reward and a big Christmas present by buying myself a cutting machine...because I deserve it.
Yes you heard me right I said I deserve it.  To be happy and to pursue the things in life that I love...So yes I am getting over the holidays and moving forward in a very positive direction.  Just thought I would let you and every body know that I am getting better.  The depressive episodes are not lasting as long as they did before I started working the program here and in the panic center two years ago on Christmas day..I have bounced back in 5 days this time not 5 months....I am feeling really good about this......I am getting better.....
 
Red
13 years ago 0 199 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Lance,
 
Hi!  It's great to hear from and how well you are doing. Congratulations on the job and getting your life back on track.. Thank you for you words of wisdom and comfort...  
 
Red
13 years ago 0 194 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
@ Red, I'm sorry you're Christmas isn't good right now. Hopefully in the future?
 
You sounded so good last time I was here, I hope your okay.
 
I realized through all my feeling bad about all this, then just accepting the way things are (at this point in my life) that it's not so bad. I think sometimes our expectations of the holidays far exceed what they really should be. Especially for us, the people pleasers and the ones that "think" we really dont want anything in return.
 
Beating ourselves up over everyone elses happiness doesn't help us one bit. We shouldn't suffer needlessly because of what we think things are supposed to be. We do the best we can and learn and grow. Sounds easy right? Heck no, sure it's hard, but we start with baby steps and in time, it is better. Breathe, we need to be better breathers. It's something I learned and have it posted all over. In the begining it was mainly for anxiety, but it's helpfull in everything. We take breathing for granted. Learn breathing techniques. Its easy.
 
I hope I help some here and hope i didn't start anything upsetting. I know it's hard for many this time of year for various reasons and I'm glad we all have a place to come for support and comfort. I wish all of you peace and happiness.
13 years ago 0 653 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I'm sorry to hear that, Red and Brightsunnyday. It is a challenging time for many. So, with it firmly in the rearview, time to focus on the positive and the bright future ahead! Set some goals and plan on how you will achieve them. Don't forget about the program- might be a good time for a review.
 
Tiana, Health Educator
13 years ago 0 199 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
The day after.
 
I too find the holidays very painful...This year was the worst one yet and I took the Christmas tree out of the house on Christmas eve day..It was just to painful to look at. I am really glad Christmas is over.  I hope that I can start to recover from Christmas again now that it is over...
 
Red
13 years ago 0 2606 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi brightsunnyday,
 
The holidays can be a challenging time for many, find solace in the fact that you are bringing joy to others.
Continue working through the program and post often. We are here for you.
 
 
Samantha, Health Educator
13 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Xmas day....
I am not alone. My family is here. But I feel so lonely I think I wish I was actually alone. It sounds so petty that I don't even want to think like this but watching my family open all their gifts and me being the only one that did not receive any gifts was devastating. It shouldn't matter. I give every year not expecting anything in return, but when nothing is what I get I am heartbroken. Yet I knew it was going to happen! I should not say heartbroken. That is not really what I feel. I don't really feel sad. I just feel empty...void. I just went upstairs alone and laid in bed...didn't sleep ...just laid and stared at the wall for hours. I feel nothing....just heavy. Like someone drained my blood and pumped in mercury instead.
I hate the holidays.....
 
13 years ago 0 653 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Lance,
 
Thanks for posting. It sounds to me like you are doing great! I'm so glad that you have made such progress! It's important for you to realize how far you have come in a year- that is the kind of positive thinking that will get you through the long weekend. Many of us are alone at this time of year and it can be challenging. You sound like a do-er. Not everyone celebrates Christmas so maybe to distract yourelf, you can venture out into your community/city and see what is still happening. What about taking the plunge back into the gym? Or doing some grocery shopping and healthy cooking? Take this time to catch up on things?
 
What is everyone else doing who is not anticipating this weekend? You will see lots of me, as I'll be here all weekend!
 
Tiana, Health Educator
13 years ago 0 194 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Not really a set back. I have actually been doing quite well with a little dip here and there.
 
Since things got better a while back everything has been pretty well. I love my new job, but because of it and the schedule and commute time I currently face, I havn't been to the gym, maintained a good self care program, including good diet....and I'm working my tail off. (an old habit) So, I know what I need to do and In the process of doing it.
 
The good part is, I recognize the er of my ways and know how to compensate before the spiral starts.
 
I still feel that once meds (which i'm still taking) gave me the kick start, then education and "action" is what made all the difference. No one can fix us, we have to and I think we all can. We have to want it bad though. I takes time and patience and work. I know it's hard to think things will get better, because I didn't believe it myself. But you know what? They did!
 
So what does that have to do with holidays again? Well just because I'm doing good, the world doesn't stop. Christmas # 3 without my kids, alone, struggling with money still, because half goes to my ex and I need to move. So what do I do? I dwell, beat myself up and feel sorry for myself. I am good at those things. So I need to figure out what I'm going to do for my long 4 day weekend, see when I get to go to work I'm busy, happy around lots of people. I still have no friends per say. I know a lot of people, but still a loner. It would be so nice to have a special lady friend to be with, but maybe one day.
 
So, I try to be optomistic, but there are the times we need to be creative to get through the rough patches. Last year at this time, I was not nearly at the point I'm at today and I was unemployed, so I know things do get better in other area's as well.
 
I hope that all made sense. There is a lot of good, but life happens as well.
 
Happy Holidays

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