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Been there, done that ...Any other suggestions?


15 years ago 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hi Sarah,
I think the alone thing might be coping or it might be a new preception.  With the anxiety you might feel boxed in by just one or two people, but now that you have a Good Experience you can use it as your reference. 
 
 I was in the store and all was fine last time.  This time it will be the same.  big .  No the time before that and No Ifs, Ands, Buts, Ors.  This is the point of reference.  I went to a Huge store and had a load of fun finding great specials onm stuff we needed.  i was calm and happy.  No Maybe's, no what if's. I really needs the items and when I went to the store I was calm and relaxed and got everything we needed with a bit left over. I am proud of this effort.
 
It is when we slide into the doubts that the anxiety is at its worst.  It is easy to question.  It becomes a habit and as we imagin a situation going from bad to worse Everything because plausable -not probable only plausable- and the panic has us wher it wants us.
 
So this experience is a really good effort!  Bravo.  Keep up the good work Ma Belle!
 
15 years ago 0 29 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sarah, I'm impressed with all the things you are already doing to help yourself. You show a lot of determination and strength of character.
I have a hard time believing that any of these things will work for me. I have come to see myself as helpless in terms of depression. It comes and visits for a while and I cannot evict it from my house. Then it leaves for some reason, only to return when I least expect it. My life can be rolling along just fine and WHAM - I have that visitor again.
I know I am sliding into a lot of bad habits. Drinking, eating the wrong things, sleeping late, staying up late, not exercising, avoiding people, shirking my responsibilities... I know, inside my head, that these will not help me. But I can't find the willpower to avoid these things anymore. I used to have a very strong will, but now I am like a leaf tossed on the waves, unable to control my life.
I need something new to latch on to. Some new theory, some new trick I can use to force myself to do the right things. My knowledge that these things can help me isn't enough to get me to do them.
Kudos to you for getting out, even if it was exhausting. Every positive action reinforces the good parts of your life and helps to keep the negative parts at bay.
 
Suzy
 
15 years ago 0 229 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi wildcat.. maybe our gerbils are related?  There's just so many of them... uuugghhh!
It's weird you know you ask for help from family and friends and they come and then over the
years they dwindle away - too busy, family, work etc etc.. Who can blame them as this whole
thing with hubby has been going on for 6 yrs straight.  I'm just feeling so alone especially
in the last 10 days.  I do have a fabulous dr. but hey he can only take me so far because 
this is my life everyday 24/7. 
 
I have to admit though that today I FORCED myself to go to the mall.  At first I was feeling
really shaky and was sure an anxiety attack was coming but it didn't.  It was like I was almost
willing it away .. strange huh?  Anyway went to the mall and felt at some point like I was the
only one there.  Am I totally losing my mind or is it just a coping mechanism?  I don't know.
I went to Sears and picked up a few things we need for our new kitchen and washroom which
will be renovated by the city (we live in housing) in August.  There were some good sales
and it really took me away from my problems for a few hours.  Now I'm really exhausted
from this outing.  *huge sigh*
 
Overall though I think that getting out was a way of facing the fear that I couldn't handle
going out and I did it.. so that's a good thing.  And I didn't think about smoking (in day
79 smoke free) so that was a plus as well.
 
Thanks for taking the time to respond wildcat.. and I wish some peace and tranquility in your
day and this evening.
 
Sylvie.. I'm seeing my dr. again on June 4th and I'll be telling him everything.  I think there's
a good chance that hubby will be given another monetary gift to get him back into the
chronic care hospital again to give me some respite.
 
Sarah

15 years ago 0 1288 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Sarah,
 
Welcome to our support community. You've come to a great place. You'll find a lot of great information and supportive members ready to help.
 
Have you been to see a doctor recently?
 
 
Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator
15 years ago 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hi Sarah,
I have the colony of gerbils in my head and when the anxiety raises, well the gang escapes and I have to pick them up one at a time... this thought is useless, it is fueling my anxiety;   this thought will get me nowhere , I can't predict the future for 5 years;  this feeling is part of my series of catastrophy senarioes that only causes my heart to pound and my chest to hurt.
 
do you have other family to really get the load off your shoulders for a bit?  or a good doctor?  It really helps to talk about the worries and fears that comes with caring for the ill, even if they are our loved ones! 
 
it is great that you meditate,  it can help you sort out a lot of what is going on ... rather than just letting go, let the turbulance wash over you and move beyond it it understand what is the source of your sadness, your pain and stress.
 
I have a whole bunch of hobbies but when depressed bubbles are the most I can get to.  so if you are down it might be good to accept any and all help you can find to get some Good rest; some healing.
15 years ago 0 229 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I have been in a depression for 8 yrs plus and I've changed so many things in order to feel better.
I'm now into day 78 smoke free, I eat healthy foods, I get out every single day for a good long walk,
I try very hard to get together to go out with friends and if going out isn't right for me because I just
can't stop crying or I look like a piece of crap then they come to my home to visit.  I also practice
meditation and try very hard to get as much 'me' time as possible as I am my husband's primary
caregiver.  We're both on disability....
 
My question is this..
Are there any other things I can be doing in order to stop the constant gerbil inside my head
running on a wheel so fast that I feel I am going to totally lose what's left of my mind?
 
Any and/or all suggestions will be greatly appreciated. Oh yes I  have a number of hobbies like
drawing, writing, painting, crocheting.. although I do admit right now and for the last week and a
half I just cannot get motivated to them nor much of anything else.  I'm at a very low period and
I'm running out of kleenex.
 
Thanks.. Sarah


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